Mama, Rock Your Short Shorts

MAMA, ROCK YOUR SHORT SHORTS!

Finally a quite time to reflect on a Sunday that caught me off guard recently.  I’ve learned that I’m very ignorant to others looks and judgements of me.  I think it’s part because I don’t care.  Maybe it’s fear of people’s dis approval?  But I genuinely feel that people are good natured.  I feel People mean well and I’m perfectly happy in my little bubble of rainbows and unicorns.

I recently went to the super market on a Sunday morning.  We (as a family) went a little later than we normally do so the Churchies were out.  As a woman who defines God in very different terms as most in our small little Texas community,  I’m perfectly okay with that.  I love our community, I love the people in it even though our beliefs are so different.   I call the dualist on Sunday mornings, Churchies.  I mean no harm in this.  Yes, I am defining them.  But, I mean no harm. 

This one particular Sunday at the Super Market, I was in my typical $XXX.xx  white trash jean shorts with holes and usual white tank top.  I don’t know what it is about wearing grundgy looking clothes and only I know how much I paid for them.  It’s like my little secret that I feel like I’m doing something rebellious. 

Next thing I know we come upon the Assistant Principal at my boys’ school right by the hot dogs.  They were with family and very nicely dressed for a churchy Sunday morning.

We stopped to say the typical social greetings and I kept looking at his wife so I could politely introduce myself.  I tell you, that lady didn’t once give me a second look during our conversation.  But of course, I kept taking my glance back at her just in case she were to extend a greeting to me.  Shit, in hind site I should have made her shake my fucking hand but hey.. I let it go.  I did catch her glimpsing at my shorts.  (legs maybe?)  IDK, maybe she was thinking damn, those are nice holy shorts.  Whatever she was thinking, I caught her fair in square looking at my bottom half.  Last I checked my eyes were not on my ass. 

So then I decided to do a social experiment.  I was going to look at every woman that I saw that morning.  I would say hello in hopes to be present, in my moment and perhaps make a new acquaintance.  Do you know, that almost every woman looked at my bad ass shorts?!  I can’t believe they were so infatuated with those shorts.  

Of course I know they were not looking at my shorts, they were judging me.   Let me back date this story to a conversation my friend and I had over a year ago.  She asked me, ‘Do you get looks at the school from other moms when you wear short shorts?”  For the record, she was not judging me.  We were having an honest conversation because when she wears those types of shorts, she said she gets looks. 

I couldn’t answer her.  I had no idea.  I am always tip toeing through the tulips at the boys’ school so I really couldn’t say.  Later that night Kyle and I were chatting and I asked him, do you notice the other mom’s looking at me when I wear short shorts?”  He responded quickly, “yes.  I do.”  I then said, “well I guess I shouldn’t wear them anymore.” 

His response to this day brings me to tears.  “Fuck those bitches.  You wear what you want to wear.”  One of the sweetest conversations I’ve ever had.  His response uplifted me and gave me the reinforcement I needed. 

I work hard for my body.  I take my nutrition very seriously because I know who’s watching (my boys).  I stay healthy so I don’t get back on my Erika HATE band wagon and want to starve myself.  Fuck those who made me doubt myself. 

I’m gonna keep wearing my white trash jean shorts and flip flops.  I drink vodka, wipe away chicken wattles (see blog from August)  and refuse to be confined by societies straightjackets.  I’ll let people judge me and be okay with that.  They are judging me because of the way THEY feel in reaction to what I’m wearing or doing.  That’s on THEM,  Not me. 

Share this blog with others who need to be reminded that THEY ARE AWESOME!  Stay authentic even if it’s not the accepted thing!